Utah
He walked through those doors as he had so many times before. After a long day of work, a long week of restlessness, he finally found respite in the one thing he truly felt belonged to him. That moment, that once through those doors, he will be able to forget everything and just let go. He will be able to focus on a singular task and not think about the daily trivialities. He will be able to no longer think about the clients that would pester him, the friends who asked too many questions and expected too much from him, the artists who just did not follow or did not feel the way he felt. For those moments, once through those doors, he could forget all those problems and just focus.
He did this almost daily. This was his sanctuary. This was his place to breathe, be, smile and make new daily friends. He would share a joke, a pleasant handshake, and after parting ways, it would not be thought of again. This was his easy place. This was his place to forget and to live in those present 24 seconds.
He did as he usually did, focusing on the singular problem that grabbed his attention. This was the beautiful line and the interesting movement that drew him near. This was his problem – difficult to solve immediately but still within reach. She asked a question. He was doomed.
Hers was a question on movement. He would answer and she would smile. They would converse about various related subjects. They conversed quickly and succinctly. They could easily forget. But, he saw her the next time, and the time after that. Their repetition was not easy to forget. He made it a habit to come in and hope to see her. She made it a habit to ask questions and greet him with a pleasant smile and promising eyes. He exchanged pleasantries and developed a crush. She didn’t think of it. He looked forward to seeing her. She gave him her phone number. He called.
She said she was eating an egg. He wondered who eats an egg at eleven in the evening. She told him stories about living in different parts of the country and seeing many things. He was interested. She told him about living in Chicago and finding her car flooded from a burst water pipe. He was fascinated. She told him about camping in Utah and California. He directed all his attention to her. She laughed. He was hers.
He walked through those doors as he did so many times. She wasn’t there. He figured that people are busy and just focused on the mental release at hand. He attempted to relax as he usually did. But, in the back of his mind, he wondered if she would show up. He would keep a peripheral eye ready. She wasn’t there. He tried to forget and focus. This helped him manage for a short while. He saw his friends and forgot about work and the daily trials. He found more beautiful lines and more distinct movements. He discovered new problems and new slightly out of reach solutions. He focused all his power to a single object and gave it his all. He achieved some success, some failure, and a lot of time to contemplate.
He continued to walk through those doors, rarely seeing her. The times he did, she was in the distance with another focus. She went about her days there, as he did. She focused, she attempted, she succeeded, and she failed. He wanted to focus, attempt, succeed, and fail with her. He would pass her and wave. She would pass him and smile. She would walk up behind him and grab his arm. He would turn around and ask questions. He would make a dry comment behind her. She would turn around and smile recognizing his voice and showing it with her eyes. He would not succeed but he would not fail. He accepted.
He was in his mode of relaxation. He was focused and attentive. He knew nothing outside of his current focus and was intent on solving it within 30 seconds. He attempted relentlessly and was near his goal. He could feel success at his fingertips. He took a moment to collect his thoughts. He focused on the task before him. He focused on the new beautiful line and the new distinct movements. She was watching him. For the first time, he did not notice her. She placed a comforting hand on his back. She complimented him. He knew that voice. That voice was eating an egg at eleven in the evening over the phone line. He turned around to smile and ask questions. She introduced He to Him. His focus was shattered. His solution felt years away. He would not succeed. He accepted.
He would still walk through those doors. He would try not to see her. He would always see her. He would focus. He would find the beautiful line with the distinct movement. He would attempt to forget his day and his worries. He would aim for success after failures. He would reach those extra four centimeters and feel the top for a few moments. Nothing could touch him. He could not be shaken until he was back on the ground looking for his next focus, his next way to forget, his next way to escape.
He would see her without trying to. She would not see him.
He did this almost daily. This was his sanctuary. This was his place to breathe, be, smile and make new daily friends. He would share a joke, a pleasant handshake, and after parting ways, it would not be thought of again. This was his easy place. This was his place to forget and to live in those present 24 seconds.
He did as he usually did, focusing on the singular problem that grabbed his attention. This was the beautiful line and the interesting movement that drew him near. This was his problem – difficult to solve immediately but still within reach. She asked a question. He was doomed.
Hers was a question on movement. He would answer and she would smile. They would converse about various related subjects. They conversed quickly and succinctly. They could easily forget. But, he saw her the next time, and the time after that. Their repetition was not easy to forget. He made it a habit to come in and hope to see her. She made it a habit to ask questions and greet him with a pleasant smile and promising eyes. He exchanged pleasantries and developed a crush. She didn’t think of it. He looked forward to seeing her. She gave him her phone number. He called.
She said she was eating an egg. He wondered who eats an egg at eleven in the evening. She told him stories about living in different parts of the country and seeing many things. He was interested. She told him about living in Chicago and finding her car flooded from a burst water pipe. He was fascinated. She told him about camping in Utah and California. He directed all his attention to her. She laughed. He was hers.
He walked through those doors as he did so many times. She wasn’t there. He figured that people are busy and just focused on the mental release at hand. He attempted to relax as he usually did. But, in the back of his mind, he wondered if she would show up. He would keep a peripheral eye ready. She wasn’t there. He tried to forget and focus. This helped him manage for a short while. He saw his friends and forgot about work and the daily trials. He found more beautiful lines and more distinct movements. He discovered new problems and new slightly out of reach solutions. He focused all his power to a single object and gave it his all. He achieved some success, some failure, and a lot of time to contemplate.
He continued to walk through those doors, rarely seeing her. The times he did, she was in the distance with another focus. She went about her days there, as he did. She focused, she attempted, she succeeded, and she failed. He wanted to focus, attempt, succeed, and fail with her. He would pass her and wave. She would pass him and smile. She would walk up behind him and grab his arm. He would turn around and ask questions. He would make a dry comment behind her. She would turn around and smile recognizing his voice and showing it with her eyes. He would not succeed but he would not fail. He accepted.
He was in his mode of relaxation. He was focused and attentive. He knew nothing outside of his current focus and was intent on solving it within 30 seconds. He attempted relentlessly and was near his goal. He could feel success at his fingertips. He took a moment to collect his thoughts. He focused on the task before him. He focused on the new beautiful line and the new distinct movements. She was watching him. For the first time, he did not notice her. She placed a comforting hand on his back. She complimented him. He knew that voice. That voice was eating an egg at eleven in the evening over the phone line. He turned around to smile and ask questions. She introduced He to Him. His focus was shattered. His solution felt years away. He would not succeed. He accepted.
He would still walk through those doors. He would try not to see her. He would always see her. He would focus. He would find the beautiful line with the distinct movement. He would attempt to forget his day and his worries. He would aim for success after failures. He would reach those extra four centimeters and feel the top for a few moments. Nothing could touch him. He could not be shaken until he was back on the ground looking for his next focus, his next way to forget, his next way to escape.
He would see her without trying to. She would not see him.
